Happy Birthday!

Tomorrow my baby will be seven! Seriously, where has the time gone? I want to share her birth story because since becoming a doula, I have learned that sharing positive birth stories can benefit others, especially those young impressionable girls whose only idea or knowledge of childbirth is what they see on TV (and we know how that goes). 
I have a best friend, and when I was pregnant with baby number 2 she was living in Florida where she started to volunteer as a doula in a hospital program. For the longest time I thought she was "adoula" LOL! I used to call her and ask what is it that you're called again? I asked if she wanted to attend my birth and she flew up the week I was due. I can't remember the days exactly, but at some point I tried to get labor going because she wasn't going to stay indefinitely.  I did all the things that one would call "old wives tales"- relaxing massage, sex with orgasm, walked, spicy food, and an enema, pretty much in that order.  And so around 10 pm that night contractions started, and I made everyone go to bed. I took a shower, played music in the baby's room while I tried to relax all the while thinking "what was I thinking" I didn't want labor anymore! But those contractions kept coming.  Around midnight they were 5 minutes apart so I woke everyone so we could get ready to head to the hospital. But when I told my husband they were 5 minutes apart he panicked, and started rushing around. I was totally calm, talking, not in much pain but he was acting like I was about to push! It was a rainy night, and we had to get my 2 year old to Grammy's house. Of course, my husband drove too fast despite my protest that he settle down. And guess what? We got pulled over for speeding! I recall his impatience with the officer "my wife is in labor!" No ticket, but he was told to watch his speed.  Big sister was dropped off, and to the hospital we go. I did the whole triage deal, and was found to be 2 cm...crap! But I knew it, he was going crazy for nothing. So we walk the halls, stopping for contractions. I didn't like being touched, or spoken to- I'm an internal, go to my happy place kind of birther. So my friend and doula was chatting with my husband. The moment that their chatter annoyed me was when I knew I was further along, and so back we went to get checked. My midwife checked me, and reported that I was 5cm, yay! Active labor, so we could finally get to the Birthing Suite and the jacuzzi!!!!  Once I got into that water I was a different woman. I would laugh in between my contractions, and participate in the conversation. During contractions I just breathed and imagined myself opening.  At some point I got out of the tub, and squatted during a contraction with my husband on one side and doula on the other. The midwife was going to break my water- I was 9cm at this point, but she couldn't break it! I remember my doula saying that babies born in the caul (still in the sac) are said to be angels from heaven. I don't know when my water broke, but it must have been shortly after. I really think that if the midwife didn't fool around with that amniohook, she would have been born in the caul, because she is an angel. When it was time to push I flashed back to my first birth. I was in the same room, and it was the same time of day. I told everyone that big sister was born at 5:40 am, and midwife exclaimed that she didn't think I'd push this one out by then. Maybe I was determined because when she finally arrived, and I looked at the clock I yelled it's 5:40!!! That morning my 8lb 13oz Gemini born with the Moon in Cancer came earthside, so peaceful and full of light, and she is still shining.We brought her home on Father's Day. I count myself lucky to have her, as she has taught me so much just like her big sister. It has always been a hope of mine to have two girls, because I wanted sisters (because I didn't and wished I did). How great to have what you wish. I thank my lucky stars everyday. Happy Birthday to my Sunshine! <3
PS
Nine months after giving birth I attended my doula training workshop. I was so naive. I had two great birth experiences without a lot of education just luck, and an innate trust in my body. I did not read one birth book until my training. I am almost embarrassed at my lack of knowledge, especially since I consider myself to be a pretty smart girl. I just never thought that childbirth was something that you learned, you just did. But I also didn't have a negative image of birth. My own mother birthed me without drugs, I saw plenty of documentaries in college of women in Africa just squatting in the field to give birth by themselves, and I've had a few cats gives birth under my mom's bed. So I guess being somewhat ignorant may have helped me. But I say I was lucky because I happened to ask the right person about care providers. She was the one who recommended midwives (I didn't know they existed), and the Alternative Birthing Center. Had I actually done more research, I would have had a homebirth.  So there I was at my doula workshop, eager to learn and share my fabulous birth stories, and thinking that I would hear stories similar to mine. I was wrong. Story after story was about failed inductions turned to cesareans, bullied women who lost their autonomy, cesarean births and babies in the NICU, births that were not gentle, women that had less than experiences. When it came to be my turn to tell my story, I felt bad. I couldn't share my elation when 90% of the other women were traumatized. So I down played my story, and just gave the cliff notes.  I realize now, that was wrong. My story matters. It matters on so many levels, and so I am sharing it. Birth happens, and how we are treated during this passage into motherhood, matters. Whether or not you need a cesarean, if you feel like you are heard, and you are respected, then your experience will be positive. Just be sure to get a doula. :)